Why Emotional Check-Ins are a Gamechanger for Your Wellbeing. ✨💛

The first thing that is taught to Psychology students is: “absence of mental illness does not mean presence of mental wellbeing.” You do not necessarily have to go through major challenges or transitions in order to feel certain complex emotions. Positive events do not always guarantee positive emotions either. Even exciting life events such as, moving to a new country, starting a family, or buying a house can induce difficult emotions. This contradiction often gets people confused. Often in therapy sessions, I hear people ask, “Why am I feeling this way when everything’s going right?” And honestly, the answer is not unidirectional.

All of us play multiple roles and responsibilities on a daily basis. Different roles require different emotional investments, and responsibilities require us to abide by certain societal norms. We pick these roles up as we transition in life, and they keep shaping up who we become. Stuck in the hustle-bustle of daily life, it can be quite challenging to trace these emotions back to their roots. That’s why a little emotional check-in can go a long way.

What is an Emotional Check-In?

It is a conscious practice of:

A. Acknowledging your emotions.

B. Taking a pause to reflect on your emotional needs, and

C. Assessing what can be done better to support yourself.

Picture that you’re having a terrible day at work, and you have a mandatory social gathering to attend afterwards. The gathering can either lift your spirits or completely drain your energy further. An emotional check-in during such a situation would look like: taking some time off after your work where you sit with a snack or beverage of your choice. You can either take a paper and pen to note your thoughts down, call up a loved one to talk, or simply sit with yourself.

You can ask yourself these questions to get in touch with your emotions:

• What label would I give to my current emotional state?

• How heavy is this emotion on a scale of 1–5?

• Have I experienced this before? If yes, what has helped me in the past?

• How can I look out for myself as I attend the social gathering?

This example also showcases how a small emotional check-in can help you make your perspective a bit more solution-oriented.

There are multiple ways of checking in with yourself. Some of the most common ones are:

1. Journaling

A practice of letting your thoughts flow on a piece of paper. It’s often preferred when you are looking to vent or are caught in an overthinking spiral. There are multiple versions of this method, and it doesn’t have to be a one-size-fits-all. You may use journaling prompts, questionnaires, or even writing tools.

2. Downtime

It is recommended to have at least a few minutes of your day where you spend agenda-free time. This means indulging in activities that make you feel good and are not outcome-oriented or linked to your productivity. The whole point of downtime is to create space for emotions to resurface so that you can process them.

3. Speaking to a Mental Health Professional

Unpacking your emotions with a psychologist can help you gain valuable insights, recognize unhelpful patterns, and learn effective coping mechanisms like boundary setting, grounding, and rational thinking. Therapy is not a quick fix, so it may not provide you instant results or solutions. It’s instead a scientific and sustainable method that helps you grow, heal, and feel empowered.

4. Moving ASAP (As Slowly As Possible)

Contrary to popular beliefs of hustle culture, you do not have to make the most of every activity. In fact, slowing down is the body’s way of regulating your nervous system to help you function better. Whenever possible, try not to multitask or fill up your time with mindless scrolling or apps running in the background. Think of a small activity at the end of the day — like having dinner or reading a book — that you will do as slowly as possible.

Please note that emotional check-in is not a one time activity but a rather a continuous practice that can help you gain more emotional awareness and regulate emotions more effectively.